Ekrem Çulfa


Kadikoy Psikoloji, Danışmanlık, Rehberlik
ve Koçluk Merkezi


0216 347 60 03  &  0505 767 58 85

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Aile A Evlilik Danışmanı İlişki Uzmanı Prof Dr Ekrem Çulfa 0533-3738123
ekremculfa@hotmail.com
ABUSE OR SEXUAL ABUSE WHAT SHOULD BE DONE FOR THE CHILD?
22/11/2020
ABUSE OR SEXUAL ABUSE WHAT SHOULD BE DONE FOR THE CHILD?

Harassment and sexual abuse cause enormous trauma and loss of confidence in the child throughout his life. Indicating that children have difficulties in describing and expressing the abuse they experience, experts warn families to pay attention to changes in their behavior.
Family Counselor from Istanbul Mylife Family Counseling Center, Dr. Ekrem Çulfa stated that the child, who was sexually abused, was threatened against his physical and psychological integrity, and said that this threat caused a considerable trauma in the child.

BEWARE OF THE CHANGE IN BEHAVIOR!

Stating that the first thing to do after the detection of sexual abuse is to restore the physical safety of the child and take him / her under protection, Çulfa stated that the child who was abused or sexually abused gave both physical, psychological and psychological reactions and listed the reactions as follows:
“Sleep disorders, opposing parents, acting suddenly and without thinking about the end, and appetite problems are common problems. In addition to these problems, there are clear clues in understanding sexual abuse.
One of these symptoms is that the child shows more interest in sexual matters than his / her age, engages in sexual behaviors that are not compatible with his / her age, and talks. In addition, these clues include the need to touch the genital area very often, to show his private parts, to kiss his mother and father or another person excessively, to show a desire to touch them too much.
Examples include wetting the child day and night, having conflicts about school-peer, having nightmares frequently at night, and describing his body as dirty or damaged. In addition, there are clues about the situation experienced by sexually abused children in the pictures they frequently draw, in the games they play or in their dreams. "

DIFFERENT REACTIONS ARISE IN EVERY CHILD

Noting that the existence of all these situations does not mean that 100% of the child is abused, Family Counselor Dr. Ekrem Çulfa said, “Symptoms may differ from child to child. While a child is withdrawn and exhibits behaviors of crying and complaining about his body, another child may become more angry and aggressive than before. Rather than dividing it into male or female symptoms, the change in the child's usual behavior and behavior is the biggest determinant. "What is important at this point is that mothers and fathers observe whether the child has behaved outside of its usual state".

CHILD SHOULD BE PROTECTED

Family Therapist Dr. Saying that "sexually abused child is threatened against his physical and psychological integrity", Dr. Ekrem Çulfa made the following warnings:
“This threat can cause substantial trauma in the child. In the period after the sexual abuse is detected, the child should be rested without judgment after the physical safety of the child is restored and after taking him / her under protection. If the child has explained this to a teacher, the teacher should report this to the appropriate places and family. If the child has explained this situation to his family, the family is obliged to inform the necessary places about this situation. Because sexual abuse is a crime and it must be reported to the necessary places. "
THE CHILD SHOULD LEST AWAY FROM THE JUDICIAL!

Stating that the people around the child are the people who will give the child the most support to overcome the trauma, Dr. Ekrem Çulfa said, “Therefore, these people should listen to the child without any judgment and provide him / her with a sheltered and safe area. Sentences should never be made to the child as "sin, shame, we have to hide", it should be conveyed that the child will always be supported. However, care should be taken that this protection is not excessive. The child should not be kept away from his social environment and school. This trust and protection should be provided without isolating the child from the outside world, ”he said.

SHOULD BE DISCONNECTED WITH THAT PERSON
Emphasizing that the relationship of the child with the abused person must be terminated, Family Counselor Dr. Ekrem Çulfa made the following recommendations:
“The child should be informed that that person can no longer harm himself. Because the biggest deficiency of a child who is abused is that he does not feel safe. Families should know that the child may have trouble sleeping, appetite, and emotion regulation for a while, and they should not wait for the child to return to his old order immediately. The child should be approached with understanding and should not be pressured to quickly return to the old order. Feelings of anger and guilt can sometimes be seen in families due to sexual abuse. Thoughts such as "we couldn't prevent it, it is our fault, we couldn't protect" can be seen frequently. These types of thoughts can increase anger and guilt, and this can be reflected in the child. At this point, parents should regulate their emotions as much as possible and not blame themselves. However, most of the time, families and children cannot overcome these situations alone, they may need professional support. "

PROFESSIONAL HELP SHOULD BE GET

Stating that trauma treatment is a special psychological treatment, Family Counselor Dr. Ekrem Çulfa said, “At this point, it may be necessary to get professional help for the child. If sexual abuse and the traumas caused by it are not treated, their scars can be seen in adulthood. Disruptions in the development of sexual identity, chronic depression, personality disorders, insufficiently healthy relationships, and problems related to the opposite sex may occur. It can cause disruptions not only in adulthood but also in the current life of the child. Disturbances in attention functions, intermittent bursts of anger, severe forgetfulness, withdrawal from school and friends, and decreased communication with family can be observed. Such situations are inevitable when the trauma is not resolved and treated. " said.

If you have a problem with children, adolescents or adults, call the professional support line +905447243650.
See you in good days. Goodbye Be Friendly. Stay at peace with your loved ones and life.


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